Post by daphnedarwin on Jun 18, 2016 22:27:36 GMT -5
My husband told me I should surprise him, if I want to have baby it's fine with him. He has 2 kids already I am raising with him. I have thought seriously for a year or so about having a child but only got the nerve to stop my birth control a couple months ago. My Dr. told me to really make sure I wanted this bc once I stop the pill "things will start working."
The past few weeks I was thinking I could be pregnant but I took a test and it was negative. I was having full blown period symptoms, tender breasts, fatigue, usual stuff but extreme. The past week I have had horrible cramps which is not normal for me and also no blood. Yesterday on our 5 yr anniversary I started bleeding heavily, also not normal for me. The cramps became horrible and I did not want to move. I was at work and kept having the urge to go to the restroom so in and out I went. I went in again and passed not only bright blood but something I had never seen before. At first I thought it was a clot but it was not. I am now absolutely sure this was tissue. The more I read and the images I have pulled show that I most likely have had a very early miscarriage at 5-6 weeks.
I was sick and stunned the rest of the day. Husband was working and our anniversary so I decided not to mention it until today. I did not even know I was pregnant (which still seems unreal to even type) so did I have any right to even be upset? I looked online for advice on whether to tell your spouse you miscarried if they didnt know you were pregnant and it was overwhelmingly "YES OF COURSE TELL THEM".
This advice is not right for everyone.
When I told him today that I has stopped my b.c. he asked why and said he did not recall telling me to surprise him. When I went on to tell him I thought I had been pregnant he did not understand. I tried explaining to him it was very early, he knew I had been in pain and cramping all week and it was awful ysterday and I had passed "something". He said he was sorry that he was sure I didnt do anything wrong and we should get ready to leave to go to the dinner and movie we planned to celebrate our anniversary. So we left. On the way home he mentioned having sex, and I said No. I feel pretty bad in that area. I was shocked he would even suggest that.
So an hour or so ago he asked if I wanted to do anything "sexual" which pretty much meant he wanted to get any action possible. I hit the fan. HOW can someone be so insensitive and uncaring and selfish? He said he doesnt understand me, that he isnt a woman, a doctor, nor has he read an anatomy book. I told him his sperm implanted my egg and grew for a very short time and died and I do not feel good physically or mentally. He told me I am crazy and emotional and asked what I wanted him to do about it. He asked if it can even be called a miscarriage and what did I want a funeral ??
I feel very alone in this. I feel empty. I feel like I absolutely thought for a long time about having a child and made a very wrong decision. And honestly I feel like maybe I have no right to even be upset if I didnt know 100% I was pregnant before the miscarriage. How can I hurt so much for something I didn't know I had. He asked me if it even counts, and I dont know.
The past few weeks I was thinking I could be pregnant but I took a test and it was negative. I was having full blown period symptoms, tender breasts, fatigue, usual stuff but extreme. The past week I have had horrible cramps which is not normal for me and also no blood. Yesterday on our 5 yr anniversary I started bleeding heavily, also not normal for me. The cramps became horrible and I did not want to move. I was at work and kept having the urge to go to the restroom so in and out I went. I went in again and passed not only bright blood but something I had never seen before. At first I thought it was a clot but it was not. I am now absolutely sure this was tissue. The more I read and the images I have pulled show that I most likely have had a very early miscarriage at 5-6 weeks.
I was sick and stunned the rest of the day. Husband was working and our anniversary so I decided not to mention it until today. I did not even know I was pregnant (which still seems unreal to even type) so did I have any right to even be upset? I looked online for advice on whether to tell your spouse you miscarried if they didnt know you were pregnant and it was overwhelmingly "YES OF COURSE TELL THEM".
This advice is not right for everyone.
When I told him today that I has stopped my b.c. he asked why and said he did not recall telling me to surprise him. When I went on to tell him I thought I had been pregnant he did not understand. I tried explaining to him it was very early, he knew I had been in pain and cramping all week and it was awful ysterday and I had passed "something". He said he was sorry that he was sure I didnt do anything wrong and we should get ready to leave to go to the dinner and movie we planned to celebrate our anniversary. So we left. On the way home he mentioned having sex, and I said No. I feel pretty bad in that area. I was shocked he would even suggest that.
So an hour or so ago he asked if I wanted to do anything "sexual" which pretty much meant he wanted to get any action possible. I hit the fan. HOW can someone be so insensitive and uncaring and selfish? He said he doesnt understand me, that he isnt a woman, a doctor, nor has he read an anatomy book. I told him his sperm implanted my egg and grew for a very short time and died and I do not feel good physically or mentally. He told me I am crazy and emotional and asked what I wanted him to do about it. He asked if it can even be called a miscarriage and what did I want a funeral ??
I feel very alone in this. I feel empty. I feel like I absolutely thought for a long time about having a child and made a very wrong decision. And honestly I feel like maybe I have no right to even be upset if I didnt know 100% I was pregnant before the miscarriage. How can I hurt so much for something I didn't know I had. He asked me if it even counts, and I dont know.