Kayt
Junior Member
Posts: 70
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Post by Kayt on Mar 14, 2013 13:52:45 GMT -5
I'm not really sure how to feel right now. A good friend of mine is currently in labor and will be having her baby today (went into labor last night and the doctors were going to induce her today, so they're making sure he comes out today). I want so badly to feel happy and excited for her but instead I feel miserable and insanely jealous. Her and I were pregnant at the same time and now she gets her little miracle and I get to go back to work. I actually had to leave work today because I couldn't stop crying. It was horrible. My eyes are actually burning from crying so much. She's one of my best friends, why can't I just be happy for her? It makes me feel like a terrible friend. I also can't really go to her when I'm upset anymore because I don't want to bring her down. She deserves to be happy... I also have this ache in my heart knowing that my arms being empty and hers being full is probably going to drive a wedge into our friendship. We're already miles apart and I can imagine she's going to be very busy now. I guess I'm just feeling pretty lost right now and really unsure of myself.
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Post by jezebel on Mar 22, 2013 13:15:22 GMT -5
Maybe if she had you as GOD MOTHER this may help I don't know how far you live from her but maybe this would tie you two together once more. You could by a gift once in a while for her child and have the child call you a special name. I can't say I know what you are going through Forgive me I think it is normal what you feel and I don't think this will drive a stake through the friendship if she is a good friend I think you should tell her of your feelings I am sure she will understand I would. If you are as close before and she IS your friend RIGHT? she will understand.
I am so sorry
Rhayden
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Kayt
Junior Member
Posts: 70
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Post by Kayt on Mar 24, 2013 10:15:30 GMT -5
Thank you for the kind words Rhayden,
Unfortunately she's not always the greatest friend. I love her dearly and we've been friends for a very long time but there are times where she can be incredibly insensitive or selfish. For example, the last couple of months she's done nothing but complain about being pregnant and any time I told her it upset me she would freak out at me and tell me it's not all about me. I know it was partially because of the hormones that come with pregnancy and her being extremely uncomfortable but it left me feeling so lost when her and I used to talk about anything together. I'm afraid now if I tell her how I feel she'll feel as if I'm trying to take away her happiness and shut down even more towards me. I try to stay positive when I talk with her.
We also live quite far away and I'm certain her sister and her sister's boyfriend would be first choice as godparents (which would be a good choice as they're good people).
And don't get me wrong, she can be a really good friend. I just know that she's having to change her life a lot to accommodate her new little bundle of joy. I don't want to sour her happiness either, I want her to fully enjoy being a mother.
I do feel a lot better now that her son has been born safely, I think a lot of what I was feeling was fear that she would have her son taken from her also. She unfortunately broke her tailbone some how during birth and is still quite uncomfortable but I can handle her complaining about that as I know how painful that break can be (I'm clumsy and fall down a lot...). I just wish life wasn't so confusing. Here's to hoping I will be as happy as she is this time next year. I know I can never replace my Alexander but I do look forward to growing our little family and I really enjoyed being pregnant even when I felt sick or uncomfortable I knew it was for a very good reason
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Post by jezebel on Apr 19, 2013 8:05:01 GMT -5
Friends can be awful bad but in light the child was born safely maybe things will quell, I am sue she feel bad for you and your lost. There is nothing but time to help with your loss but I think if you are the best friend and just be there when she needs you (and not if you think she is using your kindness) I think things will get back to normal with your friendship.
I am sorry for your unhappiness
Rhayden
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Kayt
Junior Member
Posts: 70
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Post by Kayt on Jun 10, 2013 19:05:29 GMT -5
Please pray for my mom's speedy recovery. She had a stroke last night  the doctors say she's expected to make a full recovery but it sure shook me to my core. I don't know what I'd do if I lost my mom at this point in my life. I know it'll have to happen one day but it's far too soon right now. I'm flying out to be with her tomorrow morning for a couple of days. To top it all off my body keeps giving me mixed signals. I keep feeling like I'm pregnant but tests all come back negative. |
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the doctors say she's expected to make a full recovery but it sure shook me to my core. I don't know what I'd do if I lost my mom at this point in my life. I know it'll have to happen one day but it's far too soon right now. I'm flying out to be with her tomorrow morning for a couple of days.