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Post by MomofBuilder on Nov 15, 2005 7:18:09 GMT -5
Leslie, I think that having our son's death dates near the holidays may not make a difference as far as easier or harder. There is no easy and we would miss them at holidays no matter when they died. Thanksgiving was for a long time my favorite holiday. That had changed to Christmas since that is the only holiday we are sure that our daughter and her family will be with the rest of us.
I hope that I will be able to spend Thanksgiving being thankful for all of the happy memories of Aaron and the others as they were growing up.
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Post by MomofBuilder on Nov 15, 2005 7:21:03 GMT -5
Shirley, it meant a lot to me that you understand my feelings of coming home hoping all will be well. Also, I appreciated your understanding of my feelings of pain with the leaves falling and the weather getting colder. Fall has long been a hard time for me, too. I just don't feel as well in fall and winter. It seems so long for spring to come again....
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Post by MomofBuilder on Nov 15, 2005 7:26:15 GMT -5
Corinne, I remember last Christmas season being a blur. Fortunately I had already done most of the gift-buying for our two little grandsons. We managed to get other gifts by running into a store together, choosing a few things, and leaving as soon as we could pay for them. My husband and I wept openly throughout the entire Christmas Eve service. I just don't know how things will be this year. I think harder yet in some ways because it will be the first Christmas that will be painfully not a blur.
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Post by MomofBuilder on Nov 15, 2005 7:28:52 GMT -5
Joan, my birthday is a month after Aaron's. I remember so strongly that it didn't seem right to have another birthday when Aaron didn't get to have his.
My daughter's birthday is just six days after Aaron's. In 2006 she will turn 30 as he was. Her life will have been the same length as the total of Aaron's life. That will be hard, too.
Thank you for understanding and caring.
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Post by anitaf on Nov 16, 2005 18:30:33 GMT -5
Hi Carol,
I did not know you before because Matt just left me but when I first saw all of you I knew that I had to keep coming back. I do work away from home during the day and the hardest thing I did was to leave my house< Matt's house> I left because my husband and son and daugter that that we could all just "Die INSIDE" and that Matt didn't expect any more. Well knowing Matt he was going to be P'SSSD so to make his BIG BROTHER goe back to college and his older sister to stop saying that she didn't want to work anymore because Matt wouldn't was evidently to me off my A'ss. I went back to work way to fast and have been begging for helop form all of you since. I can't come home a day without pulling in from of my house wanting Matt to be there either giving me a hard time for blodking his car in or just saying HEY MOM I Love you by the way I......................... I come home every night going into Matt's romme wanting to be there with him. I am evidently not supposed to. I sit at this computer right know because I am not right now able to walk past Matt's room and not
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Post by MomofBuilder on Nov 16, 2005 20:40:29 GMT -5
Hi Anita. I am so sorry about your Matt! I have a hard time coming home and going to work. My work adjoins the hospital and I have never been able to desensitize myself to being right there. I also travel the path that we drove to the hospital that horrible night.
I am glad you come here. Carol
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