NEW TO THIS BOARD AND NEED ANSWERS

[alexandersmom]

HELLO LADIES, WELL I HAD BEEN ON I HAD A STILLBIRTH BOARD FOR A COUPLE OF MONTHS THEN I MOVED OVER TO PREGNANT AFTER A MISCARRIAGE(STILLBIRTH). And NOW I'M JOINING YOU. I HAVE SOME QUESTIONS THAT I'M HOPING SOME OF YOU CAN ANSWER. I WENT FOR MY 8 WEEK CHECK-UP TODAY AND SHE DID ANOTHER U/S. HAD ONE LAST MONDAY AND THE BABY MEASURED 6WEEKS AND 1 DAY AND WE SAW THE HEARTBEAT. WELL TODAY THERE WAS NO HEARTBEAT AND SHE SENT ME TO RADIOLOGY TO CONFIRM. SO ALL TOGETHER TODAY I HAD 3 U/S'S ALL SHOWING THE SAME THING. SINCE MY DR APPOINTMENT WAS A LATE AFTERNOON APPT I WASN;T ABLE TO REACH MY DR AND HAD TO SPEAK WITH SOEMONE ELSE FROM HER OFFICE. SHE TOLD ME THAT I HAD 3 OPTIONS. SO I'M REALLY CONFUSED AND COULD USE SOME ADVICE OR AT LEAST SOME INPUT
MY OPTIONS ARE
1. SCHEDULE A D&C
2. WAIT AND LET MY BODY TAKE CONTROL WHICH SHE SAYS COULD TAKE A FEW WEEKS FOR IT TO DECIDE TO EXPELL IT
3. THEYCOULD PUT PILLS IN MY CERVIX TO MAKE ME START TO DILATE AND MISCARRY
ANY ADVISE OR WORDS FROM PERSONAL EXPERIENCE WILL GREATLY BE APPRECIATED

[Coping]

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I think the decision is very personal. I started to m/c naturally (in the middle of the night), but the OB in the ER still advised that I have a D&C. I did go ahead with it, and I am glad I did. For me, the procedure itself was the easist part. I really had no physical pain or discomfort whatsoever after it was over. Just very sleepy from the drugs and being up all night. I only had bleeding for a week, and it was not heavy. The OB said I could bleed for 4-6 weeks if I went the natural route - and then could have complications and still need a D&C. I was in enough pain - I didn't feel I needed that reminde or the worrying about complications. But, again, that is what felt right for me . Do what feels right for you.

[daisy]

Hi. I replied to you on PAM as well . I am so very sorry. I wanted to agree with another reply-for me the D&E was the easiest part of the whole thing. The procedure itself was easy and the recovery was virtually painless. BTW I had a D&E, not a D&C, which is a slightly differnt procedure. I was actually glad to know that physically the ordeal was over. Emotionally, of course it is another story. My doctor said the same thing too that I might need the procedure anyway even if I tried to go naturally. For me it was just the right thing to do. I know that some people prefer not to do this. Talk to your doctor about the options-my doctor's office was god about explaining my choices. Again, so very sorry. (((hugs)))

[Freedom]

First off, I am so sorry you are having to go through this. I know it is different than your stillbirth and I hope that you will make the right decision for you as to what to do. I did read your post on PAM. I am from MTOM. I have had 2 second trimester losses which both of them I was induced at the hospital w/ cytotec (oraly and also inserted) and delivered early s/b's. They were treated as s/b's and I went home w/ boxes of momentos and pictures. With my 3rd loss it was quite different. I decided at 11 weeks that I would just have the d&c. Unfortunately, the baby was too big and I had remaining "tissue" left inside the uterus from baby Joseph and hemmoraged w/in 5 days later. I had to have a repeated d&c. It just made things all the more worse. This is rare, but it does happen w/ older gestational babies. I was told that 8 weeks is safe. You may want to get another opinion from your dr. if you can get a hold of him. There are also complications that can arise w/ cytotec....hemmoraging. I did not though. This is a tough decision you are having to make. It is so sad. I just wanted to let you know my experience w/ the options you had. Many warm hugs to you as you move through this terrible decision.

Tonya

[blessedmom2four]

I am so sorry that you are experienceing pain yet again. It just doesnt seem fair that you should go through so much in such a short time. About what to do, I can tell you what I did, I found out on June 29 that my babys heart had stopped beating. I was told to go home and think about what I wanted to do, they suggested that I have the baby at home. So I sat at home and waited five days, and I'll tell you, I was more emotionaly scared carying my baby dureing that time then I ever thought possible. In one way I couldnt bear the thought of anyone takeing my baby in such a way as they would with a D&C but in anther way I wanted it over. So finaly after waiting those five long days I went in and told them I wanted a surgery. The surgery was fairly quick and painless and I can honestly say, I began to regain some (SOME) stability after it was over. I have heard that the cervical pill method can be fairly painful. But ultimatly you need to make the choice thats right for you. Hoew do you feel? Do you feel you are emotionaly strong enough to carry this baby until its over.
thinking and praying for you.
LIz

[nboulier]

I am so sorry for your loss. I have moved to the More than one Mis. but saw your post here. My first m/c was in August and I was 10 weeks along. Had already heard heartbeat at 7.5 weeks, but after some bleeding there was no heartbeat found at this u/s. Since I was already bleeding my dr. highly recommended a d&c to rule out any infections that may occur. I was in such shock I just did what he suggested and had the d&c that afternoon. I bled for about a week and had no pain from the procedure, as someone else said, just tired.
I also had a m/c in October when I was 'just' pregnant. THis too started with spotting. I went in for an u/s and saw a sac and what dr said looked fine. About 36 hrs later I started bleeding heavily. I was actually out of town at a women's retreat and had the m/c over the weekend, thankfully it was not painful, i imagine because I was not far along. I only bled for about 4-5 days with this time. I saw dr when I got home and they just confirmed that i had a m/c.
I just wanted to share my experiences.
Thoughts and prayers to you during this most difficult time.

[alexandersmom]

THANKS LADIES YOU GIRLS ARE WONDERFUL. I TOOK THE DAY OFF FROM WORK TODAY AND LAID AROUND AND DID ALOT OF CRYING AND THINKING. LAST NIGHT MY DH TOLD ME HE WANTS ME TO HAVE THE D&C BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT ME TO GO THRU EVERYTHING I WENT THRU TO DELIVER OUR SON. THE DR CALLED ME TODAY TO CHECK ON ME (I LOVE HER SHE IS SO WONDERFUL) AND WE DISCUSSED MY OPTIONS, SHE ASKED ME WHAT I WANTED TO DO. SHE TOLD ME IF I WANT THE D&C THAT SHE WILL GET ME SCHEDULED BUT SHE ALSO TOLD ME THAT WITH A d&C YOU RUN THE CHANCE OF SCARRING OF THE UTERUS WHICH SCARES ME AS I HOPE SOMEDAY TO HAVE A BABY. SHE ALSO TOLD ME THAT IF I DECIDED TO WAIT THAT SHE WOULD BE THERE IF I CHANGED MY MIND THAT ALL I HAVE TO DO IS CALL THE OFFICE AND HAVE HER PAGED. AT THIS POINT I THINK I AM GOING TO WAIT A FEW DAYS I WORK AT THE SAME HOSPITAL THAT I HAD MY SON AND I WOULD HAVE TO HAVE THIS PREFORMED. I THINK I WOULD PREFER TO BE AT HOME BUT I ALSO KNOW THAT IF IT GETS TO BAD I WILL END UP THERE HAVING A D&C ANYWAYS. SO I AM STILL A LITTLE CONFUSED.
SHE ALSO TOLD ME THAT IF I LET IT HAPPEN NATURAL WHAT TO EXPECT. BY MY LMP I SHOULD BE 8 WEEKS BUT THE BABY ONLY MEASURED 6 WEEKS 5 DAYS SO SHE TOLD ME IT SHOULDN'T BE TO BAD SINCE IT IS SMALL. SHE SAID I WOULD HAVE SOME BAD CRAMPS AND PASS IT AND THEN SHOULD BLEED FOR ABOUT A WEEK. BUT AS I READ EVERYONES RESPONSES I SEE EVERYONE WHO HAS GONE THRU THIS HAS HAD DIFFERENT OUTCOMES. THANKS AGAIN AND I WILL KEEP YOU POSTED

[troopie]

I just wanted to let you know my experience. I had a m/c in July 2004. I was six weeks along. I had started spotting a little and immediately started trying to find a dr to go to as I had none at that time. The only dr that would see me told me that I should just go home and if I had heavy bleeding more than the day then to go to the hospital. I went home and started cramping. I cramped for awhile and bleed some and passed a lot of clots. Finally I passed the baby and the cramping eased up and the bleeding eased up. I continued to bleed for about 5 days and that was just like a period. I just want to say that even now I have a hard time when I have AF especially when I cramp and bleed. I have had 2 AF that I was scared I was having another m/c. It's scarey sometimes. I was never given a choice about what I wanted to do I was just told to go home and let nature takes it course. Please feel free to email me if you need to talk just put SG in the subject.

[sadmomof3and1angel]

Im sorry for your loss. I too was almost 8 weeks, mine was a tubular. Ask your doctor about injections of methotrexate. What it is is a medicaction that they inject you with and it induces a m/c.I dont know if they can do that with a "normal" pregnancy. Like I said mine was a tubular. It takes effect within a few days. It is hard no matter what you choose, but this way speeds it up a little bit. I wish you lots of love and luck in whatever you choose.
Love
Kelly

[my3girls]

I responded to your post on PAM yesterday & I wanted to let you know about the scaring from a D&C - I have had 2 & I was warned that they CAN cause some scaring - that chance is much lower with a more experienced doctor performing it though. If that worries you - you can always ask for a hysteroscopy later on when you start ttc again. That procedure takes about 5 minutes & is "fairly" painless, again - depending on your doctor. It's just a small camera on a rod that looks like an internal ultrasound & they shoot some water in your uterus & insert the rod & it takes less than 5 minutes ~ it's actually a pretty cool thing to watch on the screen. (My best friend went w/ me since my DH couldn't get off work & she has officially seen the "video" of my uterus ) There was no scaring in mine so I don't know how they would solve that problem if there was some found.

I just wanted to let you know that yes there is a chance for scaring - but if the D&C is something that would make you more comfortable - don't be afraid of it & let that reason stop you.

PM me later if you want to ok?
Brie

[Mommy2amazingGrace]

I bled for my entire pregnancy. I was 10 wks and I bleed almost right from the beginning. My m/c was "naturally" but I had a D&C a month later because my DR found traces of the pregnancy hormone still in my blood, apparently I hadn't passed it all. The D&C put my mind at ease, knowing that I was not at risk anymore, and since I couldn't bury a baby, it may sound morbid, but it was a way to say goodbye. I hope that you make the right decision depending on what your heart is saying. It's hard but it helps.

[Teardrops]

I'm so sorry you had to make this choice....I decided to let my body do it on it's own. I think I was so sad that I just wanted it to be personal with no doctors just me home and I talked to my little one as I knew I was loosing him . I am so glad I took that time with the baby all alone. I still look back on it and it gives me a sense of peace in my hardest moments. I also do know a d&c can cause scarring which can hurt future pregnancies but I did have a followup appt to make sure everything was expelled. I'm so sorry sending you all my prayers

[lostone]

Hi im not sure if u made a decision yet but i did it on my own i was suppose to go in for a D&C but i got scared because i have a fear to be put to sleep so i decided to let nature take its coruse and it took a week & 3 days till i miscarried but i also decided to do it that way because the thought of doing a D&C hurt me alot cause im really against abortions and the way they explained to me what a D&C was made me feel like i was killing my baby i know my baby was already gone but i was in denial and i felt like i was the one killing my baby if i do it that way so i needed to miscarry on my own in order for me to understand my baby was gone it helped me understand that i wasn't aborting my baby it was hard n it hurt but for me it was the better way and for u all i can do is tell u my experiece and y i did it but i can tell u what to do u gotta go with what u feel u should do in your heart but with whatever you choose my prayers will be with you and if you ever need to talk im here