For those of you who are thinking about

[Lendy]

seeing a therapist or a counselor.

I just wanted to let you know that I waited over 2 years after my m/c before seeing a therapist. And while each case is different, my therapist has helped me soooo much.

I discovered that I have a problem with change and what she calls "complicated grief". Because not only was I still deeply greived after 2 1/2 years for Jamie (my m/c baby) but after 4 1/2 years since my grandmother died. I hadn't held my grief in, but I was 'stuck' and I didn't know how to get out. After just one, yes one, session; I felt sooo much better and felt that it was ok to 'move' on with my life.

I only wish that I hadn't waited 2 1/2 years after my m/c before seeing my therapist.

I have been going to her since the end of July and I was scared at first to go, scared of what people would think (oh, she must be crazy), scared of what would come out. But now, I'm scared of not going to see her. It is a shame that insurance won't pay for me to see her for the rest of my life.

My therapist, Ginger, has helped me realize alot about myself and my relationships. And I have grown quite a bit in the past few months. I don't have many friends around here and it is nice to go somewhere that I know she won't judge me and I can be 100% honest and she will tell me what she thinks and help me do what is best of me and my family.

She can't prescribe drugs so this wasn't the 'easy' way out. I have been on Zoloft for a while, and it worked great, but when I came off of it, I was worse off than I was to begin with.

I don't really know why I am sharing all this information, but just a bit of advice, if you are considering it...try it! What can it hurt. I was scared to try and I lost 2 1/2 years of my life because of it.

If you need to talk, I'd be glad to listen or to share more of my experiences. Please feel free to email me at [e-mail]!

Lendy ;D

[AlanasMomma]

I'm with Lendy on this. Counslings is a GREAT idea.
They give you great tools to help you deal with things that you normally wouldn't be able to deal with.
On top of all of that, it's great to have someone (a thrid party sort-a-speak) you can go and chat with and not have to worry about hurting or worry that they are juding you. They just give you the truth and nothing but. They don't sugar coat it and tell you wha tyou want to hear, they tell you what you NEED to hear.
Trust me, it's a GREAT outlet, miscarriage or not.

[sadmomof3and1angel]

I started seeing a therapist a few months ago. Then a phychiatrist a few weeks ago. I dont know what I would do with out either

[nikkimount]

I see a psychiatrist once a month and have to see a primary therapist twice a month to see the psychiatrist. I just started doing this 2 months ago. It has helped a lot. Come to find out I've been bipolar for years but I also have post partum depression. Now that I'm on my meds I am as happy as can be. Aside from the usual PMS grumpyness I'm now happier than ever! Seeing a therapist really does help.
-Nikki

[becca]

Here, here, Lendy! Thank you for being brave enough to share your counseling experience. I, too, saw a counselor after we lost Madeline. Started 6 months after we lost her and stayed with it for about 3 years (including part of our IF journey). I am very open about my positive counseling experience, and my counselor also said I was experiencing "complicated grief." I pray that everyone would get the help they need through counseling or other means.

Becca

P.S. Counseling does not have to be expensive. Some churches have on-staff professional counselors that practice based on donations to the church. Also, almost every community has a county or community mental health association. Counseling there is generally charged for on a sliding scale basis.