Post by danischmitz21 on Mar 9, 2012 1:35:50 GMT -5
Our Little Jacob had to be taken at 25 weeks because he was not growing in my womb anymore, because his placenta was too small--I was told this was just bad luck. I had spent 7 days on bed rest in a hospital two hours from where we live; while Jacob and I were monitored 24/7. It was a Very stressful time for Ryan and I received no sleep from all the monitors and alarm going off during that 7 days. I had 4-5 ultrasounds a day to closely monitor his well being. Jacob had extremely severe early-onset Iugr(Intrauterine growth restriction) which in turn resulted in him also having other complications, for instance low amniotic fluid developed, fluid around his heart, absent flow to placenta and heart decals.
On Monday, Feb. 27th my precious Jacob was born by emergency c-section because he was extremely stressed and they said he could die at anytime, and he had a better chance outside then inside the womb. Unfortunately for us, they predicted his weight around 500 grams and thus he would of had around a 35 % chance of survival at 25 weeks but had a 92% chance of having moderate to severe disabilities throughout his life. We did not care what disabilities he could have had we wanted him anyway, he was our child who we brought into this world and we’re going to do whatever to save him. They did a classical emergency c-section and it was so terrifying because we knew that Jacob could be smaller than the estimated weight they predicted and he would most likely die immediately. Also, since they had done a classical c-section (the way they did it in the olden days) I would not be able to try and conceive again for 18 months to 2 years, and all my future children would have to be delivered c-section plus delivered at least 2 weeks early. Anyways, they offered a medical termination because the risks of Jacob’s survival and a normal life outweighed the risks of having complications during the c-section and having future children. However, how would i give up on my child in whom I carried for 6 1/2 months and have become so close to, talking to him and feeling him kick me while in the womb? I just could not do this. Anyways, we decided to give him a chance because our love for him was so great. If he was going to die it was going to be out of our hands and because of nature not because of a decision we made and would of had to live with forever.
It was absolutely scary but Jacob was born at 4:14 on Monday Feb 27th and immediately rushed into the other room were the NICU team was ready to try and save his life. Ryan went to be with our son as I was wheeled back to the recovering room. It was there where I found out the devastating news that my precious little Jacob only weighed 13 ounces or 470 grams. This is 3 ounces under the 1 pound mark that the doctors had predicted. I knew at this time that I would probably never see my son alive. However, He was a fighter and when I made it down to the NICU he was still alive. I got to meet him even though I was in severe pain from the major operation. The first 3 days went surprisingly well. WE would go down every 4 hours for care time all through the day and even made all the night time cares. Care time is where we would help change his diaper and check his vitals. I would stick my hand in and he would squeeze my finger over and over while I sung Jesus loved him over and over and would explain what the nurses were doing and not to be scared for mommy and daddy were there for him. These cares times were the best memories I had with my son.
Day 4, I woke up with a cold sore and was banned from the NICU for 2 days, which was extremely painful not to be able to spend time with my son who was in critical condition. However, Ryan went during every care time and things were looking a little more positive, so hope developed that maybe our son could survive this and be a miracle child. However, that is the thing about micro preemies things can turn in an instant and they did for our little Jacob.
On the 6th day I was able to see him again, however, I was unable to touch him so I would just sing and talk to him. Ryan had to head back to Grand Island and start work again for he had used all his sick leave. When I went in for the first time on Sunday, day 6, I noticed that his heart rate was much higher than it used to be (210 bpm rather than 160 bpm) and I demanded the NP to come look at him and they decided he was stressed and decided to start giving him pain medicine every two hours. I came back a few hours later and noticed that he looked gray and when I called Ryan, I told him that he appeared dead and was not responding to my voice like he once did. Around 11:30 that night I suddenly could not sleep, I started to pray for my son that his heart rate would go down and his color would come back and this was just a minor bump in the road. However, during my prayer I was called by a NICU nurse to come down immediately that my son was not doing well. I rushed down to the NICU and saw them try to resuscitate my son. They were pounding on his chest and about 6 nurses and 1 doctor were around him, a memory I wish I could forget. The doctor came to me and said there was nothing more he could do. I collapsed in his arms screaming out Jacob’s name and they took me to a chair and I handed me my son as his heart slowing began to stop. This was the first time I got to hold my son as he died in my arms. My sister-in-law came to be with me for she lives in Omaha as Ryan was called at midnight and made the 2 hour drive to Omaha from Grand Island. We held our son for 5 hours before finally placing him back into his incubator bed. Sadly enough for us we had to meet immediately will a clergy man and make funeral arrangements, which is a parent’s worst nightmare. Ryan was kind enough to make these arrangements and I stayed out of it. We decided to cremate Jacob’s body and we will go pick up our son in Omaha on Friday afternoon. .
Jacob’s intestines had perforated and liquids were leaking in his stomach. The pain caused him to go unconscious and it was a good thing he passed away so the pain could stop. We are thankful for the few days we got to meet our son; however, it makes the pain so much worse because of the false hope we developed.
On Monday, Feb. 27th my precious Jacob was born by emergency c-section because he was extremely stressed and they said he could die at anytime, and he had a better chance outside then inside the womb. Unfortunately for us, they predicted his weight around 500 grams and thus he would of had around a 35 % chance of survival at 25 weeks but had a 92% chance of having moderate to severe disabilities throughout his life. We did not care what disabilities he could have had we wanted him anyway, he was our child who we brought into this world and we’re going to do whatever to save him. They did a classical emergency c-section and it was so terrifying because we knew that Jacob could be smaller than the estimated weight they predicted and he would most likely die immediately. Also, since they had done a classical c-section (the way they did it in the olden days) I would not be able to try and conceive again for 18 months to 2 years, and all my future children would have to be delivered c-section plus delivered at least 2 weeks early. Anyways, they offered a medical termination because the risks of Jacob’s survival and a normal life outweighed the risks of having complications during the c-section and having future children. However, how would i give up on my child in whom I carried for 6 1/2 months and have become so close to, talking to him and feeling him kick me while in the womb? I just could not do this. Anyways, we decided to give him a chance because our love for him was so great. If he was going to die it was going to be out of our hands and because of nature not because of a decision we made and would of had to live with forever.
It was absolutely scary but Jacob was born at 4:14 on Monday Feb 27th and immediately rushed into the other room were the NICU team was ready to try and save his life. Ryan went to be with our son as I was wheeled back to the recovering room. It was there where I found out the devastating news that my precious little Jacob only weighed 13 ounces or 470 grams. This is 3 ounces under the 1 pound mark that the doctors had predicted. I knew at this time that I would probably never see my son alive. However, He was a fighter and when I made it down to the NICU he was still alive. I got to meet him even though I was in severe pain from the major operation. The first 3 days went surprisingly well. WE would go down every 4 hours for care time all through the day and even made all the night time cares. Care time is where we would help change his diaper and check his vitals. I would stick my hand in and he would squeeze my finger over and over while I sung Jesus loved him over and over and would explain what the nurses were doing and not to be scared for mommy and daddy were there for him. These cares times were the best memories I had with my son.
Day 4, I woke up with a cold sore and was banned from the NICU for 2 days, which was extremely painful not to be able to spend time with my son who was in critical condition. However, Ryan went during every care time and things were looking a little more positive, so hope developed that maybe our son could survive this and be a miracle child. However, that is the thing about micro preemies things can turn in an instant and they did for our little Jacob.
On the 6th day I was able to see him again, however, I was unable to touch him so I would just sing and talk to him. Ryan had to head back to Grand Island and start work again for he had used all his sick leave. When I went in for the first time on Sunday, day 6, I noticed that his heart rate was much higher than it used to be (210 bpm rather than 160 bpm) and I demanded the NP to come look at him and they decided he was stressed and decided to start giving him pain medicine every two hours. I came back a few hours later and noticed that he looked gray and when I called Ryan, I told him that he appeared dead and was not responding to my voice like he once did. Around 11:30 that night I suddenly could not sleep, I started to pray for my son that his heart rate would go down and his color would come back and this was just a minor bump in the road. However, during my prayer I was called by a NICU nurse to come down immediately that my son was not doing well. I rushed down to the NICU and saw them try to resuscitate my son. They were pounding on his chest and about 6 nurses and 1 doctor were around him, a memory I wish I could forget. The doctor came to me and said there was nothing more he could do. I collapsed in his arms screaming out Jacob’s name and they took me to a chair and I handed me my son as his heart slowing began to stop. This was the first time I got to hold my son as he died in my arms. My sister-in-law came to be with me for she lives in Omaha as Ryan was called at midnight and made the 2 hour drive to Omaha from Grand Island. We held our son for 5 hours before finally placing him back into his incubator bed. Sadly enough for us we had to meet immediately will a clergy man and make funeral arrangements, which is a parent’s worst nightmare. Ryan was kind enough to make these arrangements and I stayed out of it. We decided to cremate Jacob’s body and we will go pick up our son in Omaha on Friday afternoon. .
Jacob’s intestines had perforated and liquids were leaking in his stomach. The pain caused him to go unconscious and it was a good thing he passed away so the pain could stop. We are thankful for the few days we got to meet our son; however, it makes the pain so much worse because of the false hope we developed.