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Post by monicag on Jan 23, 2009 12:07:18 GMT -5
I write grants for a living...how hard can it be to write stories that people tell.
PM me if you are interested...
Clara...counting on you to outline the process of how to get it published when we get to that point.
This could be a huge stress reliever for all of us.
Who can draw..we need pictures of the twits!!!
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Post by heartsabroke on Jan 23, 2009 12:30:13 GMT -5
Yes, Yes, Yes
I agree. We could all laugh at what one another have had to deal with. And you are right, it would be a great stress reliever.
Oh, lets get started straight away!!!
Lisa
I wish I can draw, but it isn't my strongpoint. Hey, we could have our kids draw pictures. . . . . . .
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Post by monicag on Jan 27, 2009 12:52:30 GMT -5
My son Zach who is 10 is a great artist and aspires to be an illustrator for Disney someday...He'd love to draw some stuff for a book.
So here is how I picture it. The original story...of what the twits said...then what we did (which usually involves shutting down and saying nothing)...then a quick awesome response that we would have said to that person if we weren't so shocked...
Like this...
introduction to the child and the issue at hand.
(when Jesse was small he always looked like he was sleepy...nomatter what the time of day...later we found out it was his low muscle tone that made him look like that...and it was alot of work to smile)...
Me- walking happily through the store with Jesse in his stroller contently observing life.
Twit- oh your son looks so sleepy, is it his nap time?
Me- no, he just woke up
Twit- Wow! he really looks sleepy, you should let him sleep longer (implying that I shouldn't be shopping with a sleepy child)
Me- he always looks like that (regretting it the moment the words came out of my mouth)
Twit- Well, I would really give him longer naps
Me - I'll try (caving in and feeling so awful that I wasn't caring for my child)
I walk away fighting tears...
The empowered me would say this:
Twit: Wow, he really looks sleepy, you should let him sleep more.
Empowered me: Gee you have alot of wrinkles you should get your money back on your last Botox... (LOL)
come on girls....lets do this....who else whats to contribute?
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Post by judiann on Jan 27, 2009 20:32:11 GMT -5
Thats a good one ;D...LOL!!!! I haven't felt good so I've been MIA  .....but I was thinking about you guys carrying a small notepad & pen....& when "miss/mr. twit" makes a stupid remark, tell them..... "Wait a minute, Hold on{while whipping out the notepad}....Now, would you repeat that, Please"  .... of course, wearing your best, most attentive smile ;D.... When they ask what your doing...... inform them you{or a friend} are collecting data for your "NEXT Bestseller" & "May I quote you" ?...... Naturally, they will ask what the title will be............... The expression on their face???.......Priceless. I thought it would be hilarious!!! Then my age caught up to me  ......when I realized that everybody But me .....has a cell phone/blackberry thingy & could probably record the whole thing....  ......"money back on your last Botox" ......thats funny!!!! |
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Post by monicag on Jan 28, 2009 8:14:44 GMT -5
Keep em coming...we could fill up a book in a week I bet.
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Post by monicag on Jan 28, 2009 14:45:50 GMT -5
Yes....who needs artists...we could just snap a picture of the twits in action. LOL!!!
And I'm not techno savvy either...at 45 I should be but there never seems time to catch up....
Congrats on your cut and paste by the way....I got a chuckle out of your post.
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Post by heartsabroke on Jan 28, 2009 18:02:59 GMT -5
I'm just not so good with snappy comebacks. I would have loved to have had something good to say about the lady who said she always wanted to have a dwarf. It was like, you don't "want" a dwarf the way you "want" a puppy. What a broomhilda. Now I need snappy comebacks for the comments I am getting about Sophia's eyes. She has a lazy eye. We have an appt the end of Feb with a pediatric optomologist (sp?), but until then, my family, DH's family, people we don't know, keep making the nasty comments about her funny looking eyes.  I need help from all of you with some good comebacks. ;D And some encouragement to actually say them. I am a very quiet and shy person, and I have troubles sometimes speaking out. Although, if you make me mad enough, I blow. And the ever famous (Brandon's allergic to peanuts, soy, and milk), when will he outgrow it? Hmmm maybe about the sametime you outgrow your rudeness!! Or the other one is "Will he ever outgrow it?" How the heck do I know what he will or will not do? Chances are not likely. Morons. All of them. Twitty, Stinky, Crazy Morons. That's what I think. I would really love help in some things I could say. We can put these dumb things in our book too. I can't wait.  Lisa |
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Post by babs on Jan 28, 2009 23:12:47 GMT -5
See now I have been watching this post..... But I am just not gonna fit anywhere in the book because Oh believe me........I GOT JOKES and I'm quick with them! I once made a grown man cry and leave his OWN party....and that was when I was a teen......I'm MUCH better at them now!!! We call it 'Fun with Disabilities'!!!! The kids get in on it too!! One time when a friend of a friend of Ricky's stared at B for gagging , Ricky told her,'EWWWWW you must smell awful for B to gag THAT bad!!!!!!'  He is Mama's Boy!!!! B gets the ,'Is he tired?' too!! I always tell people,'No, he just figures if his eyes are closed you will leave him alone!'  It certainly takes the focus off of him!! As for the Dwarf comment I would have said,'Yeah....short and good looking...that's how we make em!' or if I was in a bad mood I might have said,'Well I always wanted an ugly baby so you should watch it!!! Since I got what you wanted....' and wrinkled my nose and walked away! I do have a pretty sick sense of humor though....I have to watch what I SAY TO PEOPLE sometimes..... I would tell people about Sophia's eye that,'..it's really FINE...she just REALLY is going to be a great actress one day because she's researching this whole 'pirate' thing and is REALLY REALLY getting into her role! We might try a patch next!' YOU SHOULD TELL PEOPLE YOUR ANSWER TO BRANDON'S ALLERGIES, LISA!!!!!!! With all the other crap we deal with should we really keep quiet and get our feelings hurt?!? You go girl.....that was a good one! |
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Post by monicag on Jan 31, 2009 12:53:14 GMT -5
BABS you crack me up and you are perfect for the book........We need to learn from you....we should have a section for "snappy combacks for the already empowered woman" YEEE HAW... You inspire me!!!
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Post by wuvmyangel93 on Jan 31, 2009 16:29:56 GMT -5
great book and I'm like barb I need to bite my tongue more.
My aspie is also a great illustrator if you need some great funny drawings.
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Post by monicag on Jan 31, 2009 20:49:07 GMT -5
This is getting good. How are you Etho? Long time no chat. Thinking of you and Kali. Jesse is getting ready for Kindergarden transition.......OH boy. But I'm more excited about what the school district can offer. HE has way outgrown Easter Seals...and his teacher is the pits.... |
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Post by babs on Jan 31, 2009 23:34:03 GMT -5
Not to say that it never hurts my feelings.....but I just seem to always find a quick come back....never let them see ya sweat!!! |
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Post by onetimefriend on Feb 1, 2009 8:43:35 GMT -5
LOL, Babs -- Ricky is GREAT! Love the fast thinking!
Lisa -- about the lazy eye. Your response: "Her eyes are fine. She just has an aversion to ugly (or stupid...or ignorance...or any number of descriptive insults).
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Post by heartsabroke on Feb 3, 2009 17:50:00 GMT -5
Well I did it. You ladies would be proud of me. I can't believe I did this. You are all wearing off of me. So, everyone on here knows that Sophia doesn't speak much. And she signs. So, I had her with me in the grocery store last night. And I ran into someone from high school, whom I haven't seen in years. (I am getting old  ) Anyhow, I didn't care for her much in school either. She was quite snobby, and I was very shy. Anyhow, she hasn't changed much. So she said, "Oh she must be a little slow." ARE YOU READY?? I actually said, cuz I was quite crabby about it. "No actually she isn't slow, she can outrun me any day. That's why I keep her in the cart." I am so proud of me. Lisa |
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Post by judiann on Feb 4, 2009 0:45:22 GMT -5
Lisa ;D!! YIPPEEE YAY for YOU ;D ;D ;D ;D!!!!!! That was a Good one!! Maybe you could be "crabby" a little more often ;D!!! juidiann |
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.....but I was thinking about you guys carrying a small notepad & pen....& when "miss/mr. twit" makes a stupid remark, tell them.....
....
......when I realized that everybody But me 
I need help from all of you with some good comebacks. ;D 
He is Mama's Boy!!!!
It certainly takes the focus off of him!! 
) Anyhow, I didn't care for her much in school either. She was quite snobby, and I was very shy. Anyhow, she hasn't changed much. So she said, "Oh she must be a little slow."