Post by heathers23 on Nov 11, 2007 14:28:52 GMT -5
My name is Heather and I recieved a link to this sight from an amazing woman I met who has gone through this as well. I would like to share my story with everyone, and I hope it will give woman all around the strenght and courage to keep fighting.
I am 23 years old and I found out I was pregnant on MArch 24, I was about 6 weeks pregnant and my b/f and I were over joyed. We told all of our friends and family, we gave our mothers mother day cards with the picture of the baby inside to tell them. My mom was very supportive and was great helping me, she decorated the baby's room for me and was willing to come into the delivery room with me.My b/f Cody from day one said that we were going to have a girl and he was excited to have a little girl. He bought tons of sleepers and outfits for her that said 'daddy's little girl'. He even picked her name out and was sticking to it from day one.
We had gotten the UC baby ultrasounds done when I was 28 weeks and it was an emotional experience for us seeing our little girl on the big screen. I had an amazing pregnancy and everything was going so well.We were prepared and ready to go and experience her joy. I was a waitress just working part time to get me out of the house, and Cody was working two jobs to help, one working nights doing constructon.
On Sept. 5 we had made plans to go out to a movie, but he called to cancel because he had gotten called into work. I decided to go and visit a friend of mine who lived about 30 mins away. I put gas inmy car and was on my way. I can't really remember much but what I do is horrible. It went down from 3 lanes to 1 on the 401. I looked over my right shoulder to move into the slow lane, but there was an SUV on my tail. I kept trying and the construction was slowly creaping up. I looked once more and he swerved towards me as well and I swerved to miss him, and I ended up rear ending a transport truck caring two trailers full of steel.
I blacked out and woke up pinned under the truck and screaming. Luckily there were 2 off duty nurses and 1 off duty doctor on the hwy to help me. The first thing I did was tell them that I was 8 months pregnant and that they had to save Lilly,if I had to die, I had to die, they just had to save her for me.
I was airlifted to St.Michaels in TO and was there for 3 weeks. I had shattered my right ankle and had compartment syndrom (pressure in my leg from all the breaks) and I almost lost my right leg. No one would tell me what was going on with Lilly, and no matter how much I fought them on it they wouldn't let me know. I refused any drugs until they did tell me. Finally my mom, dad and Cody were allowed in the ICU to see me and my mom told me that Lilly was gone. The placenta had torn away from her from the impact and she died a very peaceful death, in her sleep. I was devestated. I underwennt surgery then and there to save me. I woke up to having to give birth to Lilly. She was born Sept 6 at 12:04 pm and was so beautiful, she came out with a smile on her face like her dad. I was able to have my two best friends and both our famillies in the room to hold her and be there for a naming ceremony.
I was unable to really comprehend what was going on, so we decided to have Lilly cremated, and her ashes were placed in a teddy bear that has been by myside since then. AS of yesturday November 9, it was my official last day in the hospital. It has been 2 months and 4 days since the accident.
I am still re learning how to walk, and it will be a long road ahead of me. I can get around with crutches now, slowly, but I can do it. I do it for my little Lilly, so she could be proud to have a mommy like me. I miss her everyday and it is so hard to not blame myself for this. I always think 'well what if I' and I can't do that anymore.I am afraid now that I am out of the hospital, I no longer have that distraction of physiotherapy to keep me going....I now have lots of time to think and analyze and grieve for her. If it wasn't for Cody holding me up, I would of fallen along time ago.
WE plan on trying again soon in the new year, but I am deathly afraid another tragedy will happen. I have met an amazing woman Samantha who has been helping me get through this and I thank her so much, words can not explain how much I appreciate it. I hope that my story will give strength to other woman and help them grieve as well. I think this website is unbelievable and helpful, everyone's story is touching and we can all relate somehow. I dont know if anyone has had the same experience as me, if so, I can help you get trhough it.
God bless everyone, keep your heads high and your hearts strong, we can do it if we all stick together! (i hope that didn't sound corny!! hehe)
If anyone wants to chat, just send me an email h_stocky@hotmail.com
Thanks for reading my story, sorry if it is too long!
Heather
ps. I read the article about the woman in the car accident with her husband when she was 4 months pregnant, I would love for you to contact me if you read this.
I am 23 years old and I found out I was pregnant on MArch 24, I was about 6 weeks pregnant and my b/f and I were over joyed. We told all of our friends and family, we gave our mothers mother day cards with the picture of the baby inside to tell them. My mom was very supportive and was great helping me, she decorated the baby's room for me and was willing to come into the delivery room with me.My b/f Cody from day one said that we were going to have a girl and he was excited to have a little girl. He bought tons of sleepers and outfits for her that said 'daddy's little girl'. He even picked her name out and was sticking to it from day one.
We had gotten the UC baby ultrasounds done when I was 28 weeks and it was an emotional experience for us seeing our little girl on the big screen. I had an amazing pregnancy and everything was going so well.We were prepared and ready to go and experience her joy. I was a waitress just working part time to get me out of the house, and Cody was working two jobs to help, one working nights doing constructon.
On Sept. 5 we had made plans to go out to a movie, but he called to cancel because he had gotten called into work. I decided to go and visit a friend of mine who lived about 30 mins away. I put gas inmy car and was on my way. I can't really remember much but what I do is horrible. It went down from 3 lanes to 1 on the 401. I looked over my right shoulder to move into the slow lane, but there was an SUV on my tail. I kept trying and the construction was slowly creaping up. I looked once more and he swerved towards me as well and I swerved to miss him, and I ended up rear ending a transport truck caring two trailers full of steel.
I blacked out and woke up pinned under the truck and screaming. Luckily there were 2 off duty nurses and 1 off duty doctor on the hwy to help me. The first thing I did was tell them that I was 8 months pregnant and that they had to save Lilly,if I had to die, I had to die, they just had to save her for me.
I was airlifted to St.Michaels in TO and was there for 3 weeks. I had shattered my right ankle and had compartment syndrom (pressure in my leg from all the breaks) and I almost lost my right leg. No one would tell me what was going on with Lilly, and no matter how much I fought them on it they wouldn't let me know. I refused any drugs until they did tell me. Finally my mom, dad and Cody were allowed in the ICU to see me and my mom told me that Lilly was gone. The placenta had torn away from her from the impact and she died a very peaceful death, in her sleep. I was devestated. I underwennt surgery then and there to save me. I woke up to having to give birth to Lilly. She was born Sept 6 at 12:04 pm and was so beautiful, she came out with a smile on her face like her dad. I was able to have my two best friends and both our famillies in the room to hold her and be there for a naming ceremony.
I was unable to really comprehend what was going on, so we decided to have Lilly cremated, and her ashes were placed in a teddy bear that has been by myside since then. AS of yesturday November 9, it was my official last day in the hospital. It has been 2 months and 4 days since the accident.
I am still re learning how to walk, and it will be a long road ahead of me. I can get around with crutches now, slowly, but I can do it. I do it for my little Lilly, so she could be proud to have a mommy like me. I miss her everyday and it is so hard to not blame myself for this. I always think 'well what if I' and I can't do that anymore.I am afraid now that I am out of the hospital, I no longer have that distraction of physiotherapy to keep me going....I now have lots of time to think and analyze and grieve for her. If it wasn't for Cody holding me up, I would of fallen along time ago.
WE plan on trying again soon in the new year, but I am deathly afraid another tragedy will happen. I have met an amazing woman Samantha who has been helping me get through this and I thank her so much, words can not explain how much I appreciate it. I hope that my story will give strength to other woman and help them grieve as well. I think this website is unbelievable and helpful, everyone's story is touching and we can all relate somehow. I dont know if anyone has had the same experience as me, if so, I can help you get trhough it.
God bless everyone, keep your heads high and your hearts strong, we can do it if we all stick together! (i hope that didn't sound corny!! hehe)
If anyone wants to chat, just send me an email h_stocky@hotmail.com
Thanks for reading my story, sorry if it is too long!
Heather
ps. I read the article about the woman in the car accident with her husband when she was 4 months pregnant, I would love for you to contact me if you read this.