Post by aschlach on Aug 25, 2006 11:36:43 GMT -5
I'm not exactly sure my story fits in this category as I've only had one pregnancy not go well. I do however have complications that will inevitably lead me to miscarry in the future so I figured this might be the right spot. Here's my story...
Three months ago I was 19 weeks pregnant with my first child. Everything seemed to be going well. We had heard the heartbeat many times, and the doctor said my uterus felt like it was ascending properly for 19 weeks. I was ready for my first ultrasound.
Excited and anxious my husband and I arrived at the hospital for the ultrasound. We couldn't believe we would finally see our baby. I thought my bladder would explode from the water. We were finally called back. I asked the tech if she saw something wrong if she could tell us. I don't know why I even asked her. She said "No, I could be fired if I'm wrong".
The ultrasound started. She starting pointing out body parts. After a minute she left to "check her printer". Which was odd because there was one in the room. Then she started taking double pictures of everything saying it was procedure. I knew something was off since she was moving all over my stomach for these pictures taking a picture of the "same" head in two different spots. She finally finished, although we never got to see certain things like the spine. She told us to wait while she showed the doctor on staff. She came back and needed more pictures. I thought she was an airhead. How could she miss so many shots. I mean I'm talking major organs. We were finally done. She didn't give us a photo though. I had to ask for one. Once we got home I got a call from the OB's office. I needed to come in and talk about the ultrasound. Then I was really worried.
The next day I saw the doctor. He told me I was carrying conjoined twins. So rare that he hadn't seen even one case in 15 years. They were attached at the chest and abdomen. They shared a heart and liver. I was shocked. How could this be? You only see these things on the discovery channel. He told me the prognosis was very grim. I would need to see a specialist.
The specialist did an extensive ultrasound for an hour. He confirmed. They were conjoined. They only had a 12% chance of making it to birth. Then a 6% chance of living longer than 24 hours. Of that 6%, only 6% were candidates for seperation. If mine could be seperated I would have to choose which one would die, and which one would get the heart. Even at that, no twins sharing a heart have ever survived seperation. If they lived unseperated, it would only be a matter of time before one got sick. It would die, and the other would follow.
On top of that the medical procedure I would have to go through to deliver could leave me unable to have children in the future, and would seriously complicate any pregnancy I was able to have.
It was highly suggested that I speak to another specialist and terminate. I saw yet another specialist. She also (3rd doctor) suggested termination. After a lot of researching and praying we decided we were led to them and this decision for a reason. We terminated the pregnancy one week after our first ultrasound. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my entire life. I will deal with this decision forever.
The only comfort I have is knowing my husband and I took advantage of the time we had with them before the procedure. We "took" them for ice cream, to the park, Chuck E Cheese, and anywhere else we could think of so that they could live out all of the things we would have done with them. They are now in heaven. I hope they can understand, and forgive us. We love them with all our hearts.
Since May I have been able to heal a lot throgh message boards like this. I now realize I didn't have another option. I am still struggling with other things though. Of course my sister was pregnant at the same time and had a little girl 3 weeks after I lost my babies. Then I got the call that one of my other sisters had accidentally gotten pregnant with her third child (she wasn't planning on having any more). Then there is my co-worker whose wife is pregnant. Pregnant people are everywhere.
Also, when pathology came back on the girls it showed that they had a chromosomal disorder. They had a monosomy on chromosome 20 (that means a part of chromosome 20 was completely missing-in our case it was nearly half). My husband and I had to get testing to see if we were carries of the chromosomal disorder as it is usually genetic (although it can occur randomly). Turns out I am a carrier. I'm ok and didn't know I had it because all of my genetic material is there, it's just in the wrong place. Unfortunately the girls inherited only the one abnormal gene from me so they were completely missing information. We are now in genetic counseling and researching options for future pregnancies as this can cause many miscarriages.
I'm also in search of a new OB since the last time I went to mine he asked how my baby was. My baby. My deceased children. What an idiot.
So that's my story. I know it's long and I appreciate you taking the time to read it.
Amy
Three months ago I was 19 weeks pregnant with my first child. Everything seemed to be going well. We had heard the heartbeat many times, and the doctor said my uterus felt like it was ascending properly for 19 weeks. I was ready for my first ultrasound.
Excited and anxious my husband and I arrived at the hospital for the ultrasound. We couldn't believe we would finally see our baby. I thought my bladder would explode from the water. We were finally called back. I asked the tech if she saw something wrong if she could tell us. I don't know why I even asked her. She said "No, I could be fired if I'm wrong".
The ultrasound started. She starting pointing out body parts. After a minute she left to "check her printer". Which was odd because there was one in the room. Then she started taking double pictures of everything saying it was procedure. I knew something was off since she was moving all over my stomach for these pictures taking a picture of the "same" head in two different spots. She finally finished, although we never got to see certain things like the spine. She told us to wait while she showed the doctor on staff. She came back and needed more pictures. I thought she was an airhead. How could she miss so many shots. I mean I'm talking major organs. We were finally done. She didn't give us a photo though. I had to ask for one. Once we got home I got a call from the OB's office. I needed to come in and talk about the ultrasound. Then I was really worried.
The next day I saw the doctor. He told me I was carrying conjoined twins. So rare that he hadn't seen even one case in 15 years. They were attached at the chest and abdomen. They shared a heart and liver. I was shocked. How could this be? You only see these things on the discovery channel. He told me the prognosis was very grim. I would need to see a specialist.
The specialist did an extensive ultrasound for an hour. He confirmed. They were conjoined. They only had a 12% chance of making it to birth. Then a 6% chance of living longer than 24 hours. Of that 6%, only 6% were candidates for seperation. If mine could be seperated I would have to choose which one would die, and which one would get the heart. Even at that, no twins sharing a heart have ever survived seperation. If they lived unseperated, it would only be a matter of time before one got sick. It would die, and the other would follow.
On top of that the medical procedure I would have to go through to deliver could leave me unable to have children in the future, and would seriously complicate any pregnancy I was able to have.
It was highly suggested that I speak to another specialist and terminate. I saw yet another specialist. She also (3rd doctor) suggested termination. After a lot of researching and praying we decided we were led to them and this decision for a reason. We terminated the pregnancy one week after our first ultrasound. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my entire life. I will deal with this decision forever.
The only comfort I have is knowing my husband and I took advantage of the time we had with them before the procedure. We "took" them for ice cream, to the park, Chuck E Cheese, and anywhere else we could think of so that they could live out all of the things we would have done with them. They are now in heaven. I hope they can understand, and forgive us. We love them with all our hearts.
Since May I have been able to heal a lot throgh message boards like this. I now realize I didn't have another option. I am still struggling with other things though. Of course my sister was pregnant at the same time and had a little girl 3 weeks after I lost my babies. Then I got the call that one of my other sisters had accidentally gotten pregnant with her third child (she wasn't planning on having any more). Then there is my co-worker whose wife is pregnant. Pregnant people are everywhere.
Also, when pathology came back on the girls it showed that they had a chromosomal disorder. They had a monosomy on chromosome 20 (that means a part of chromosome 20 was completely missing-in our case it was nearly half). My husband and I had to get testing to see if we were carries of the chromosomal disorder as it is usually genetic (although it can occur randomly). Turns out I am a carrier. I'm ok and didn't know I had it because all of my genetic material is there, it's just in the wrong place. Unfortunately the girls inherited only the one abnormal gene from me so they were completely missing information. We are now in genetic counseling and researching options for future pregnancies as this can cause many miscarriages.
I'm also in search of a new OB since the last time I went to mine he asked how my baby was. My baby. My deceased children. What an idiot.
So that's my story. I know it's long and I appreciate you taking the time to read it.
Amy