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Post by babybluesmama on Nov 8, 2015 21:45:17 GMT -5
On October 20th I found out at almost 9 weeks that my baby no longer had a heartbeat. My husband and I were devastated. The doctors called it a missed miscarriage. We waited a week, tried to process and went back for another US to confirm. Nothing had changed... No growth... No heartbeat. On Oct 28th I had a D&E and woke up in recovery completely devastated. It wasn't the same pain I felt the week prior. It was much worse and very final. I took a few days off of work to take care of myself. I cried a lot and it pain started to become less intense with each day. Then just nine days after I find out my sister is pregnant a due just one day before my due date. Although I am happy they have been blessed, the news has brought me to my knees. The pain, anxiety and anger has been crippling.
We have wanted this baby for so long and that happiness changed in one moment. I'm truly devastated about the news of my sister. I feel like I'm in a horribly bad dream. I feel that I have no strength to be empathetic towards what they are going through. I told her I was happy for her but I needed time and space to grieve my own personal loss. I am on a roller coaster of emotions. It's terrible to feel this angry and sad. My heart has been shattered. Has anyone been through something similar?
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Post by triangelmom on Nov 15, 2015 10:46:30 GMT -5
I can definitely relate. I suffered a missed miscarriage with my first pregnancy and one sister-in-law gave birth two days before my D & C. I was happy for her and my brother but it was so hard to listen to them gush and share their excitement. My husband and I had wanted our own baby for so long and we were absolutely devastated by our loss. At the same time, we learned his brother's wife was expecting. In that case, she had had a miscarriage a few months before and they were hesitant to tell us, knowing what we had gone through but I was happier for them. Be sure to have support for you and your husband and be there for each other. It's going to be hard to smile and be happy for your sister when you are feeling such grief and sadness and I think it was good that you said what you did. This is indeed a roller coaster of emotions and you will have your good days mixed in with bad days. Some days, you will wake up feeling like you can handle things and move on and some days, you will want to stay in bed and cry. I can tell you that in time, there will be more good days than bad and then there will be good days. It doesn't mean that you will be over what you have lost and it doesn't mean that you have forgotten. It just means that you have moved forward.
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