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 Author | Topic: friend just announced she due when I would've been (Read 148 times) |
sunshan
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|  | friend just announced she due when I would've been
« Thread Started on Oct 14, 2009, 10:29am » | |
Just had a kind of work colleague in work, very excited, announcing she's pregnant and due when I would have been
I knew this would come up and most of the time I try to keep a good perspective on everything - we're young, I've only had one miscarriage and we're just starting to ttc again, in the scheme of things it's all pretty positive
but being reminded that it could be me at 12 weeks telling people and getting excited, and knowing that I'll see my friend every few weeks from now until the baby is born...I don't know how to deal with it? any tips? I just want to cry and I can't really, as have a lot of meetings this evening!
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sylvia
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| | Re: friend just announced she due when I would've
« Reply #1 on Oct 15, 2009, 10:59am » | |
AWWW...I am sooo sorry. I had this to deal with after my first miscarriage. A lady I used to work with told me just a few days after my BFP that she was pregnant. Turns out our due dates were just a couple days apart. It hurt....ALOT... (((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))) I do know what you are going through...
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| | Re: friend just announced she due when I would've
« Reply #2 on Oct 16, 2009, 12:22pm » | |
(((((((hugs))))))))))
I know its hard but hang in there.
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| | Re: friend just announced she due when I would've
« Reply #3 on Oct 17, 2009, 2:25pm » | |
I went through the same thing. I had several friends who were due when I would have been with my first. I did a lot of avoiding. I don't know how I'd do it in a work situation, though. I'm so sorry 
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MamaDances
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| | Re: friend just announced she due when I would've
« Reply #4 on Oct 17, 2009, 11:06pm » | |
I'm so sorry that has to be unbearable. I had an am having enough trouble with my friend who got pregnant shortly after Everett would have been born - she's due very soon and its taking its toll on me again in ways I didn't expect. Now my bf's aunt (who lives with him) recently found out shes pregnant... I'm still trying to grasp how I'm going to handle seeing her everyday - so I can only imagine what you must be going through.
I'm so sorry.
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| | Re: friend just announced she due when I would've
« Reply #5 on Nov 5, 2009, 12:24pm » | |
hugs to you....watching people around us experience what we should have been is the hardest. I know from experience my best friend and I were due 4 days apart and after loosing Ramona it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. Watching her grow day after day killled my inside. Unfortunatly there isn't a whole lot you can do. I was happy for her and shared her joy with her when we were together and when we weren't I cried a lot and leaned on my dh. Crying always helped me. It was one of few things that made me feel a little lighter on the inside. I hope you are able to find a way to cope and "survive" when you are around this friend.
again ((((((((hugs)))))))))))
you are not alone
Kayla
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ifyouonlyknew
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| | Re: friend just announced she due when I would've
« Reply #6 on Nov 6, 2009, 9:53am » | |
First...sorry for the loss of your child. ((((hugs)))
I think its perfectly normal to react like that. If anything, you're handling it very bravely and honestly.
It's hard to see pregnant people, let a lone if they have the same due date as your angel.
I hope you find comfort in knowing, you are only human and doing the best you can. It is challenging, but you don't have to be exited and happy about her baby. You don't owe her your expressions, especially when you are trying to deal with how you feel.
(((((((hugs)))))))))
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jessb
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| | Re: friend just announced she due when I would've
« Reply #7 on Nov 6, 2009, 10:01am » | |
I'm sorry for your loss and the all this that you have to go through...
Unfortunately, it seems...there is always pg people around after you have lost a baby...I had to watch a girl last year at work who was due a month before I was get bigger and bigger and I walked into the lounge and saw a big poster announcing the baby shower for her and her baby boy...we lost a boy...I think my heart stopped at that moment...my stomach hurt and my eyes started stinging...I am actually tearing up just thinking about how awful that moment was....
My sister got pg while we were TTC again....that was hard, especially b/c I then had another miscarriage (this time early) and had to watch her ....and her son was born only a few days before the 1st anniversary of losing our Jack...
and now there are 4 pg ladies at work...one of which is due in Feb...just like I was a few months ago...so I get to see her every day and think.....hmmm...that should be me too...
Anyway...I hope I'm not making you fell worse or taking over your post....I just wanted to let you know that pretty much everyone on these boards understands the pain of watching others live your dreams and how horribly painful it can be....but you have all of us!
I hope you're having a better day! ((hugs))
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Live, laugh, love. We will breathe, laugh, cry, live... but we will never forget.
We love you forever, Jack.
As long as I can I will look at this world for both of us. As long as I can I will laugh with the birds, I will sing with the flowers, I will pray to the stars, for both of us.
Jack Raymond-born sleeping at 18wks 09/28/08
m/c - @7wks 06/09 |
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sunshan
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| | Re: friend just announced she due when I would've
« Reply #8 on Nov 7, 2009, 8:13am » | |
It's a funny thing, until you lose a baby you take so much for granted!
Thank you all so much for your love and support.
xxx
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jessb
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| | Re: friend just announced she due when I would've
« Reply #9 on Nov 7, 2009, 2:08pm » | |
That's true...I always thought I was good at trying not to take things for granted...but losing Jack has made me a different person in so many ways....mostly for the better  ....I try to remember that when I am feeling "bitter" or sad...
Try to remember that all of this will make you stronger...even if you don't want it to ..you can handle anything! One of the women on here ...Tia...has a wonderful quote on her signature...you never know how strong you are...until being strong is the only choice you have.
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Live, laugh, love. We will breathe, laugh, cry, live... but we will never forget.
We love you forever, Jack.
As long as I can I will look at this world for both of us. As long as I can I will laugh with the birds, I will sing with the flowers, I will pray to the stars, for both of us.
Jack Raymond-born sleeping at 18wks 09/28/08
m/c - @7wks 06/09 |
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